It All Began:

Since I was a child, the "BIG TRUCKS" have always fascinated me. While I loved dolls and all the "girly" things, I loved trucks and playing with miniature cars. On family road trips, I would make the universal gesture of asking for a horn blow from the big rig. Generally, the kind driver would oblige with a quick "HONK" and my day would be made. I dreamed of one day begin the driver of that BIG TRUCK and creating such joy to another child with such a small gesture. This dream would remain a secret for decades. One day, I heard of a truck driving school. Thinking this was such a long shot, I decided to investigate. On a lark, I applied and before I could even think of what I had done, I had a call from the school and a recruiter on my doorstep. It was at this point that I realized that this long ago dream could somehow become a reality and I would share this with some family members to get a gauge of what they thought.
As always, Randy was supportive. I guess you can't be married to me for over 30 years and not learn to expect the total "unexpected". He told me to go for it and that he would support my every decision. Well the others were a little less, shall I say, easy going about it. Most said - - - "YOU WANT TO DO WHAT!!!!!!" I can't say that I blame them, this did come from out of the blue, but they too thought I should go for it. I am not sure that they believed this would go much further than talk but....more on that later.
At the time of this craziness, Greg was in the toughest parts of his battle against cancer. My God what a courageous person he was. To be just half the person he was would be a nearly impossible feat. After the shock of my announcement Greg and Cindy were both extra supportive. I believe their lives had been put on hold for so many years - to see someone have a true goal and dream - they believed in me with everything they had and it was so obvious. Greg always made me feel like I could do anything....sure had him fooled, as he was the one that could take on anything ever thrown at him and be a tremendous success and this turned out to be the case time after time, event after event and challenge upon challenge.
And so.....I went forward with the application process. I scored very high on their placement and was thrilled. The only problem was the school was in VA. Since I would continue to work, my only option was to go to school on the weekend. With this in mind and the school length of 10 weeks, both Saturday and Sunday I could see problems immediately. I took a ride up to the school just to see the distance and surrounding area. I would either have to make the 6 hour round trip or rent a room for one night each weekend. Neither option sounded good to me and I could see this becoming a dream unrealized. As I was pondering my choices, Greg's health continued to decline and I also began to have more and more doubts about the time that would be dedicated to something when what was REALLY important was here with Greg. God had given us what seemed to be such a short time with him and I couldn't imagine missing time that could be spent in pursuit of a selfish silly thought that I could be a driver. I told Greg that I had decided to put my thoughts of school on hold for just a short time. Little did I know how this would effect him. He felt that he had deprived me of the one goal I had. He blamed himself for me not going full speed. I tried to tell him that I had to be true to my own heart and my heart told me that this was not right, not now. Regardless, Greg took the full blame upon himself.
Greg and I had a talk and he told me that I should follow my dreams. He said he realized that life was too short to stay in a job which made me miserable and have unfulfilled dreams. He said that if he only had more time.....it made sense to me. We get one shot and one only. Greg was right, I had to follow my dream. But, I had to listen to my heart to tell me when the time would be right. Shortly after this, my precious brother lost his battle with cancer. I believe with my heart and soul that God told me through a heavy heart to hold off on this schooling. My family was so much more important. I am so happy I had those last months with Greg although I will never forgive myself for him dying with guilt that he was at fault for my holding off on school.
I am a firm believer that there are things that happen for a reason. That square pegs do not go into round holes regardless of how much you want them to.
After Greg's death I found out about another Truck Driving School that was - get this - 3 miles from my house!!!! It was also a 10 week course that I could do on the weekends. This was an answer to my prayers. If only Greg had lived to see that this could actually happen like he wanted. I checked into this school and was received with open arms.
What a journey this has been for me. Through all of school and the sacrifices my family has made by loosing me for seven days a week for months - the dream is now coming true. This week I begin a new chapter in my life. This new chapter is the reason for this blog. I want to share this with all my family and friends, those that are just curious as to what the heck this 50+ year old woman is thinking to do this, to my close friends that have never wavered in their belief in me and to my family that continue to be my cheering section and constant support system. I am scared beyond anything I could ever tell you and yet excited about the future and what it holds. I know that I want you all to be a part of it.
And so the story continues..............................................